Fireflies by Owl CIty

You Would Not Believe Your Eyes
If Ten Million Fireflies
Light Up The World As I Fell Asleep
Cause They Fill The Open Air
And Leave Teardrops Everywhere
You’d Think me Rude
But I Wouuld Just Stand And stare
I’d Like To make Myself Believe That Planet earth Turns Slowly
It’s Hard To Say That I’d Rather Stay Awake When I’m Asleep
Cause Everything Is Never As It Seems

Cause I’d Get A Thousand Hugs
From Ten Thousand Lightning Bugs
As They Tried To Teach Me How To Dance
A Foxtrot Above My head
A Sockhop Beneath My Bed
A Disco Ball Is Just hanging By A thread
I’d Like To make Myself Believe That Planet earth Turns Slowly
It’s Hard To Say That I’d Rather Stay Awake When I’m Asleep
Cause Everything Is Never As It Seems
When I Fall Asleep
Leave My Door Open Just A crack
Please Take Me Away From Here
Cause I Feel Like Such An Insomniac
Please Take Me Away From Here
Why Do I Tire Of Counting Sheep
Please Take Me Away From Here
When I’m far Too Tired To Fall Asleep
To Ten Million Fireflies
I’m Weird Cause I Hate Goodbyes
I Got Misty Eyes As They Said Farewell
But I’ll Know Where Several Are
If My Dreams Get Real Bizzare
Cause I Saved A Few And I Keep Them In A Jar
I’d Like To make Myself Believe That Planet earth Turns Slowly
It’s Hard To Say That I’d Rather Stay Awake When I’m Asleep
Cause Everything Is Never As It Seems
When I Fall Asleep
I’d Like To make Myself Believe That Planet earth Turns Slowly
It’s Hard To Say That I’d Rather Stay Awake When I’m Asleep
Cause Everything Is Never As It Seems
When I Fall Asleep
I’d Like To make Myself Believe That Planet earth Turns Slowly
It’s Hard To Say I’d Rather Stay Awake When I’m Asleep
Because My Dreams Are Bursting At The Seams

I Can’t Wait - song

Tribute to a good friend - we’ll always remember-

It was when you’re gone
That I felt you’re near,
It was when all things are done
That I found you more dear,
Than the times I left you in absence
Thinking that you’re just asleep
But now you are sleeping
So quite, so serene and so deep.

I never had the chance to tell you
Of my world, the colors & the time
That stood still when I met you
And fell asleep when we part,
Never again did I see you
Until the news came one day-

Your world is no longer just as mine now,
I thought those things only come Someday.

I was lost for words and question,
For how could something just beginning
Be suddenly the end?
How could something so good
Find its messages unsent?

I only felt your touch and yonder
in dreams, you do tell me -
That you are more real now
Than you were before,
That you are more near now
Than the days you bore.

But I know your day is my night
My night is your day,
You make ENDS light to me,
Knowing you’d be there to see

In the name of a Holy Spirit,
Rest lovingly in our Father’s hands,

We miss you so much already
And it was all just like yesterday
When you took the time
To make people smile and laugh for a while.

I pray you will continue to do so
But with a more glorious light
With a higher level of peace
With more sacredness
With much love and prayers.

—

My Version of “I Learned. . .”

I learned that it’s okay to be misjudged sometimes, to be sometimes at the bottom of things being thrown at, to be blamed for things that were never my fault,

I learned that it’s okay to be wrong to everyone else when only One person knows that you could be right,

I learned that the things that we thought were important are not that important at all, cause importance is relative- it’s just a matter of perspective,

I learned that the little things we take for granted could actually be what is worth our while,

I learned that love can stand alone. It doesn’t need to be binded.

I learned that it’s okay to have only yourself to believe to, as long as you have faith, it doesn’t matter if everyone else thinks you don’t deserve what you have,

I learned that it’s okay to dream and become somebody as long as we are the same person inside,

I learned that it’s okay to say the truth as long as people are okay to hear it,

I learned that explanation isn’t always accepted, that forgiveness doesn’t happen voluntarily, or that "sorry" is enough

I learned that it’s okay to be sad for a while and then be happy without feeling that it’s not what we deserve,

I learned that it’s okay to say things that we mean right now, knowing that one day we grow up and have a new "say" about things we’ve once said,

I learned that it’s okay to be friendly, that people don’t own you no matter how they would possess you… that you would always be a "ONE individual", at the end of the night or start of the day,

I learned that you can’t have everyone to agree with you, believe in you or the things you do,

I learned that not all people could be happy for you even when you are already happy, expect the worst even from those close to you,

I learned that you can’t have everything, just as you can’t do everything right… but it’s okay to be wrong once in awhile and then later learn more… than not having to pinpoint that.

I learned that it’s okay to ask a lot of questions, even those that we fear to ask, or fear to know the answer…

I learned that it’s okay to sing at night, to enjoy life, to learn to drive, to take chances… as long as we stay true, doing things that we are not forced to do…

I learned that it’s okay to speak our mind, to say things that are true, to decide when things don’t feel alright, to have a stand on things no matter what is right…

I learned that it’s okay to be a fool for sometime than forever be a fool,

I learned that it’s not enough that we learn something out of books but also out of life…

I learned that it’s not enough that we go home happy and contented, we should also be thankful of it and acknowledge the trials we go through for it…

I learned that it’s okay to be ME even when it could embarass me sometimes…

I learned that it may take a while for things to be okay, but it doesn’t guarantee endings that we want…

I learned that patience bears its fruits, that waiting is actually a good thing than doing something that we would later be sorry for…

I learned that everything happens for a reason but the reason could be predetermined and could be inconclusive or illogical…

I learned that it’s okay to move on as long as we cherish and don’t hold anything against ourselves or people…

I learned that it’s okay to stop and be silent even when we want to shout and cry…

I learned that it’s okay to love even those that we detest, even more to those who hate us…

I learned that we should never stop believing in God no matter how imperfect we are, how many mistakes we’ve made or how they wouldn’t believe that we have that kind of faith… It’s okay.

Cause I learned, anyway.

Taking it Easy

It is better this way. Things are fine here. Like its imperfection settled to a realm of contentment. Like its piece become its whole. I can’t write anything right now. Inspiration is just null. I am just overwhelmed with my blue room… I got myself a blue comforter to match the blue valance… and I designed the night table with blue nothings… Think- easy breezy themes… with the scented paraphernalia, blue frames, furry things, teddy bears, beanies and glass. I think it has absorbed everything that isn’t blue. Hehe. I just find it interesting…

My weekdays are long and exhausting. Think- clients, financial ratios, recommendations to the senior management… Some clients gave me what I deserve- gifts for the effort. The management gave us an increase for our effort too. What is really cool about working is having to balance it with a good night sleep and a restful weekend. Today, I went to church and bought stuffs for our home… I cleaned my own room and spent time with my niece, Desiree. I couldn’t think of anything else right now- except free days, day off and sleep… I just need more of those and then I could conclude- it is better this way.

Good luck to my dear friends that I miss. Take it easy always.

There is No Title in Reality

I  never had the time to explain. Cause It’s difficult when people are led to believe otherwise. Explanation becomes unneeded. For some cases, it was never wanted. Deaf ears could no longer comprehend even the most logical things. Cause maybe logic isn’t always the answer. Logic doesn’t guarantee the answers that we wanted. Perhaps silence was the only alternative- if not the solution. No body knows the side of things anyway. People listen to majority, not reality. People prefer to listen among them selves and never see by their own eyes the reality of things… Perhaps people create their own contenders just as fears are made up of unforeseen things that NEVER happen. For instance, the fear of death is just as made up cause no one actually has certainty of its occurrence. Why do I write about this? There is no explanation…

Don’t judge a book by its cover.
Even the content is deceiving.
So don’t judge a book at all.

Cesca’s Box (stuffs I wrote back then)

what if you’re asked to give something tangible? Something that smells like, sounds like, feels like, looks like… Though the rest is still unknown, how much it matters to me how it feels to be on the other side. To be the scent that I smell, to be the subtle hum to my ears, to be the breeze that sweeps leaves unto my steps, to be the fog of a shadow before me. What is it like to be on the other side, to look like there’s always sunshine after the rain, to feel like everyday is to think about someone, to live like there’s a reason to look forward to, to have faith that every tear has a reasonable depth, to believe that every star sleeps next to our dreams, to be the one to look unto the sky and see a face that to the world means nightfall, but to you means the world, the spirit of existence, the joy of every smile, and the very core of your being. What does it feel to be content of all the things we know, by just being on the other side- to be the one to love and to know what it feels like to look after someone, to care for someone, to believe that there is someone like . . .

me

who all along, sits here, and doesn’t know a thing about all those things we think that exist. We are only barren, struck, hoping that someday they will unravel that what we knew all along… was after all, for realz.

—

For now, you see me like a piece of art form. Posed to portray
happiness, love and even mystery. Happiness is in the face of a girl
with the smile that she hides on her hair and things. Love portrayed on
the way her eyes glinted something precious. Mystery portrayed unto her sillhouete, the way she is cautious… perhaps unsure but unsurrendering.
moving but not completely mobile. she is but…

the art of waiting

she waits while melting…

—

Perhaps that’s what we are all about. A beautifully twisted sunshine
that you keep on hanging lose below the hills. To not to expose it at
full lenght sunshine. Cause it is when it is on half view on outskirts
of any view that it is utmost beautiful. That’s why it’s utmost
breathaking on sunset and sunrise. While it is half rising or setting.
Never yet the mundane way that it’d struck up for the rest of the day.

—

…And then who knows where the star
points at, when it find a tickle either on my eye unto his… I might
just be… who knows… falling… from the sky… like a star… into
his… steps…

this immense.

this immense.

like the world

if he would feel as immense as the world

if he would only feel as same as I would feel as such

then i have found a beautiful kind of love

—

If I ever did the right or wrong- I figured to leave it in faith, cause it’d be anyway my faith that will save me from it…
—
Obsessive giving of oneself- the vulnerability of excess hurt holds true
with it. The obsessive hoping of oneself- the vulnerability of
rejection when expectations don’t come to fit. The obsessive confidence-
could also be ego trashing once other found reasons to put us down,
reasons that are beyond comprehensible.

We have to understand things that are beyond our control and understanding. One can stop loving a person, with or without
a reason. we couldn’t further ask why the nature of love flowing in
their veins just stopped. Nor could we ask the factors cause that would
be digging to further questions: is there someone else? is it because
of lacking that lead to wanting someone else? could wanting be the
result of lacking in oneself? could oneself be not enough to give
everything that the guy wants? does everything have to be given for a
guy or shouldn’t he have compensated for the girl?

So… leads me that we might think we’re right. Or that we’re always
right. Or that we wanna be right. But what leads to becoming right?

—

LIGHT

And so there was light. Or was it the upcomming train? A gun point bullet’s fierce motion? Or that flicker of a far off castaway, trying to be heard but remains star-like, barren among the black and blue sky. So was there ever, that kind of light? Light, in the notion, of illumina. Similar to the light that perks on friend’s faces when they get hinted of their personal interest. Same light that relieves itself at the end of the night when we are ready to drift for another twilight. Is it dreams that go along side LIGHT. That perhaps light, to some, could be seeing life for the first time. While to others, light is the lantern at the cemetery. Light could be the passion that makes one walk on the most stumbling, deceiving places. Light makes us see through even the dark, most unconceivable and fathomless places. Like, the subterranea or the place where there is the dying of the light. Light itself, when dies, is exchanged with a dimmer perhaps- temporal lighting. Might be of a the lamp, the house flourescent, the star, the shimmer on someone’s eye… or on a tear on someone’s grief. Light, will always be existent. Not that there was light, but perhaps, there is light and will always have as such. For as long as there is something comprehensible, despite darkness or the stillness of the night… Light is a promise that comes even in the form of the dark places or illuminated graces. Light is there as hope, as the end that comes undone. Light, in the form of people, of places, of blazes and more. Light, is so endless, that we see them even when our eyes are close. And we feel them even when we feel senseless. There is light even in our mere thought without having to feel anything and without having to see anything. Light is there without the senses even when we are repulsive and unbelieving on it. It will shine, and it will resemble so many more things. Thats why to some, they see it as some inspiration. The light that sees through and shines in time with or without our consent, with or without our knowing. It is there, and if shall ask how it got there… then we will know…

A Year that I Leave Behind: 2007

I am here to permanently dispose all my grievances to the world. I am giving away the lost path to
solitude, my barren nature and temperamental self. I am giving up my behavior that has come to hurt other people even though it was never of my intention to do so.

I
offer my heartfelt understanding towards love, life and people who have either hurt me
whether with intentions or by accident. By nature or by mouth. By
actions or by the lack of it.

I am in complete disposal of all
emotional baggage, burdensome load and unnecessary stuffs that hold me
accountable for being a wreck. I am leaving no tarts and bits of it in
my soul that are only excess and useless to have. I am leaving the
pieces and fill in the holes with renewed purpose. I am aiding my self
from all that have been thrown at me even by earthly means or unfathomable
nuisances. I am helping myself set forth a clean footing for a new year
of fresh start.

I am in complete control of "letting go" while
cherishing and accepting that that is all there is and will be for that
time. A new time has come for new start, new songs to be sung, new
friends to create kindling with, new lessons to learn from, new
outcomes from unexpected circumstances, new stories that will unfold…

With
new start comes a new self, new beginning, new resolutions. I would use it for the full capacity of my "self". And not taking for granted what I have or failing to appreciate what I had or will ever have. Needless to say, I would be more thankful and showy of my gratitude.

This coming
year of 2008, I desire to  be an enriched individual free from all the stressors, the chains, thorns,
the obstacles, the load, the heaviness, the burden and even the dictates of society or few individuals. I want to come to terms with people who have gone against me. I want to come to terms to people who have been misunderstood or have not get my own side of things. I do not want to neglect relationships whether it is with family or close friends. I do not want to create gaps brought by silence or by the incapability to be silent.

I want to show how much I love them without feeling ashamed of expressing. I want to help people find light. I want to inspire, lead people to believe and have faith. I want to be a voice that comes from a gospel, a messenger of peace and a change that is being waited for.

Patience, trust, love and sincerity. I want to value those highly than any negative reason. That I would be able to overlook through people’s fault and find good in them no matter who they are. That I may never be judgmental or boastful. And be forgiving of those who have judged me wrong.

As I
aspire to become a source of healing in this broken world of ours. May
I be of sample of a renewed self where change is not just a miracle, it
is the solution…

HAPPY NEW YEAR !! May you have a blessed, beautiful start of 2008

Matthew Chapter 5 Verse 1 - 48

1 And seeing the multitudes, he went up into a mountain: and when he was set, his disciples came unto him:

 

2 And he opened his mouth, and taught them, saying,

 

3 Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

 

4 Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.

 

5 Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth.

 

6 Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.

 

7 Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.

 

8 Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.

 

9 Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.

 

10 Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness’ sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

 

11 Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake.

 

12 Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven: for so persecuted they the prophets which were before you.

 

13 Ye
are the salt of the earth: but if the salt have lost his savour,
wherewith shall it be salted? it is thenceforth good for nothing, but
to be cast out, and to be trodden under foot of men.

 

14 Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid.

 

15 Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house.

 

16 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.

 

17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.

 

18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled.

 

19 Whosoever
therefore shall break one of these least commandments, and shall teach
men so, he shall be called the least in the kingdom of heaven: but
whosoever shall do and teach them, the same shall be called great in the kingdom of heaven.

 

20 For I say unto you, That except your righteousness shall exceed the righteousness of the scribes and Pharisees, ye shall in no case enter into the kingdom of heaven.

 

21 Ye
have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not kill;
and whosoever shall kill shall be in danger of the judgment:

 

22 But
I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a
cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to
his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire.

 

23 Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee;

 

24 Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift.

 

25 Agree with thine adversary
quickly, whiles thou art in the way with him; lest at any time the
adversary deliver thee to the judge, and the judge deliver thee to the
officer, and thou be cast into prison.

 

26 Verily I say unto thee, Thou shalt by no means come out thence, till thou hast paid the uttermost farthing.

 

27 Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery:

 

28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

 

29 And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

 

30 And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

 

31 It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement:

 

32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.

 

33 Again,
ye have heard that it hath been said by them of old time, Thou shalt
not forswear thyself, but shalt perform unto the Lord thine oaths:

 

34 But I say unto you, Swear not at all; neither by heaven; for it is God’s throne:

 

35 Nor by the earth; for it is his footstool: neither by Jerusalem; for it is the city of the great King.

 

36 Neither shalt thou swear by thy head, because thou canst not make one hair white or black.

 

37 But let your communication be, Yea, yea; Nay, nay: for whatsoever is more than these cometh of evil.

 

38 Ye have heard that it hath been said, An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth:

 

39 But I say unto you, That ye resist not evil: but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also.

 

40 And if any man will sue thee at the law, and take away thy coat, let him have thy cloke also.

 

41 And whosoever shall compel thee to go a mile, go with him twain.

 

42 Give to him that asketh thee, and from him that would borrow of thee turn not thou away.

 

43 Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy.

 

44 But
I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good
to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you,
and persecute you;

 

45 That
ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh
his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the
just and on the unjust.

 

46 For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? do not even the publicans the same?

 

47 And if ye salute your brethren only, what do ye more than others? do not even the publicans so?

 

48 Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.

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Crafted Bits of Nothingness Tailored with Love

Unlike all things learned by scientists, predicted by astronomers,written by authors and imagined by artists- there are some things that are unexplainable that even the most common explanation would actually defeat its meaning. This leaves one clinging for answers that comes as comets or stalactites or a wonder. And that forever stays for people who are not extraordinary but has ordinary emotions- for the most part- only contradicting every testimony and belief. There is only an outrage of the shortcoming of a never discovered star, perhaps like a neglected shooting star that we fail to look up to, or a never again seen relic that instead of becoming a treasure- becomes dust.

Unlike all things that people would have thought so, or so they thought they knew everything. For those who had strong convictions, affirmations, beliefs and principle- those who stood up for their own beliefs would find themselves relating to those who are just plainly unlucky and misunderstood by the simplest of all catastrophes.

Unlike all good things that come to an end with a short precaution that it is about to end. There are still some that baffles the wise or the fool. Nevertheless, there is no real predicament, no outcome nor verdict for even the most important of TRIALS on ones life have no jury, no proof or testimony. Sometimes there aren’t even chances- to speak or to know the TRUTH or to fight for it. There is only a decision out of a reflective unjustness that exists. Often, there is only black and white. You win or you lose. And when you win, you might not want what you get. And when you lose, you barely lose anything if you already have nothing left or you lose everything else.

Unlike everything that can be determined by forecast, prepared by precaution, backed by preparation- there are some that only come about with no explanation. Is it the mystery of the grand scheme of things??? That everyone still meets an end no matter in denial or direct intent. Through nature or by accident. Is it the beginning or a locked end?

Unlike things that we find answers, or questions that common sense would comprehend, there are things that can no longer be of capacity for someone. But it doesn’t mean anything. It only means something so abstract as art as if it is a lucid stars that falls and dies a death that no one knows. How does it recover? Does it stand? Does it move on? Or does it move away?

Unlike the simplest things that some people yearn about, it could be what some would rather forget. It can only be accompanied with deep regret if pondered any longer. But with reflection, it seems like it could be the worst thing next to something anyone wouldn’t wish to happen to them. And if it did- does it rob a man from his richness? Does it take away his ability to be happy? Does it take away anything aside complete nihility- which is nothing?

Unlike NOTHINGNESS, leaving complete nothingness doesn’t leave anything… Is it emptiness beforehand? Or emptiness afterhand? Tattered bits of nothingness tailored with love- is love more of an art or a game? A way of life? Or like a ship wreck amidst islands that will never be seen, amidst whereabouts no one would hear the ghostsly imprints nor could save it wreck.

Can you actually wear a crafted bits of nothingness and become it? Could you actually find it in your self before knowing that it can kill? … Or is it just emo??